Tuesday, November 24, 2015

The World's First Trillionaire

The World’s First Trillionaire is an ebook, but it includes plot elements/excerpts from three of my novels, which are audiobooks. My hope is that you’ll go on to listen to those for the full story, not needed or included to make this ebook work...
* The IRS and the Feds, it seems, have a top secret deal with him that is more classified than the nuclear codes. (Other people have since been bribed or silenced. Or both.)
* His primary “condo” in rural Virginia is five floors, over 50,000 square feet, and has an Olympic sized pool on top, with a helicopter pad for Marine 1. There is classified laser security, which can be seen on Google Maps…but not Street View, since the nearest street is two miles past the twenty-five foot electrified fences. 
* One of his other estates is 14,000 square feet on a bluff overlooking Lake Lucerne, requiring ten servants to maintain. He has never visited, or met the staff.
* He owns thirty sports and luxury vehicles kept in pristine running condition in a climate controlled warehouse outside Las Vegas…yet he prefers to take a cab. 
* His 300 foot yacht is also submersible…and (according to one retired Pentagon source) has torpedoes.
* He apparently refers to Wall Street CEOs and televangelists who own private jets as “pretenders.”
* Celebs beg to bet against him, knowing they will lose. He has never obliged.
* There is a major movie stuck in development since the leak that he’s crossed over into Trillionaire status…even though producers know less about his life than they know about the death of Jimmy Hoffa.   
* The Sultan of Brunei gave him a baker’s dozen of Faberge eggs as a gesture of friendship. He didn’t send a thank you card.
* He often dresses like a bum in public. (This was told to a bum, who was then interviewed by Time magazine with his picture on the cover.)
* He feeds his stray cat Willy expensive Buluga caviar from a platinum coated pre-Colombian ceremonial bowl, but prefers to eat Jif peanut butter and Nutrella straight from the jar, himself. (Source: The Tattler)
* He is suspected to own a stake in the NSA, and some say NASA works for him.
* He has been rumored to possess an operational A.I. named Nexus, which can beat Wall Street, and actually knows those nuclear codes.
* CNN leaked an unnamed source stating that he has threatened to go public…with an ultimatum.
* Supreme Court Justices are forbidden to mention even his fake name, much less to convict him of anything.
* Rupert Murdoch Jr. is, as a Financial Times quote put it, “in the back coin pocket of his dungarees.” 
* His hobby telescope possesses an 8.4 meter mirror, Multi-Conjugate adaptive optics, and fourteen specialized instruments, including a multi-object wide-field spectrograph and a Planet Formation Imager for high contrast coronagraphic photography. On a clear night it would be able to see someone turn on a penlight on the moon. 
* Dozens of supermodels claim to be his girlfriend. Amid their thousands of selfies on Instagram, none of them have ever produced a single clear photo.

* The cast and crew of The Voice once staged a show from his “underground pavilion,” with the audience CGed and blue screened in with robotic assistance from his “computer lab.” The judges were in awe of the perfect replication of the set, with Blake fainting after finding the piece of dried chewing gum that he’d placed under his chair the previous season. (Confirmed by the LA Times: They all woke up in a suite at the Beverly Hills Hotel the next day, with strange mushrooms on the table being examined by the LAPD. No one knew how they got there. Not just the mushrooms, but them. Hotel staff suspect alien abduction, and pass their polygraphs.)  Ebook is $1 at BN.com, iTunes, and Kobo.

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